Full Or Empty?

We are excited to report that we are done with our case study interviews and also finished our licensing interview on Friday.  The work for us is at a stand still while we wait for the licensing and case study report to be finalized.  It was a surprise to us that it will take up to 2 months to get it all completed so that we can be put in the mix for placement.  When the social worker told us that we are desiring a very demanding age range and that it may be six months to a year before we are chosen, I looked to Tim and saw a little sadness come over him.  I tend to look at the glass half empty, so I was expecting the worst, but Tim is a glass is half full kind of guy and wasn't expecting such a long delay.  We feel ready and the boys have been so patient for the last 6 months!  I am at peace with the understanding that there is a girl waiting for us at the end of all of this.  We have not been forgotten and need to trust God's timing for all of this.  I know there will be a great deal of growth in the midst of the waiting.

There is also a possibility that we could be put on a list for relinquishment.  This is a separate program within the county's adoption system that is quite risky.  While a young mother is still pregnant, she chooses a family for her child.  Once the baby is born we go pick her up at the hospital and the mother has 30 days to finalize her decision to terminate parental rights.  The risk is that we would become extremely attached to the baby and then have the mother come back and decide to keep her.

  None of this is going to be easy but Tim and I both feel that we have a healthy, wonderful family to share with a child that needs love and permanence.  However long God chooses us for her, we want to open our hearts and share our home!  It is obvious that this will come with some tears and broken hearts.  Although we would love to protect our sons from that kind of heartache, God calls us to serve and love.  We must believe that whatever the cost, He wants to use us for His purpose!  Our boys will learn amazing things from this and I hope a greater sense of what our purpose is.  They are young, but have faith and unwavering devotion to love. 

The glasses contents are all about perception.  For as long as it takes to wait for our daughter, I want to see this process the way that God sees it, full of Him.

"Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!  How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out!  Who has known the mind of the Lord?  Or who has been his counselor?  Who has ever given to God, that God should repay them?  For from him and through him and to him are all things.  To him be the glory forever!  Amen. "

Romans 11:33-36